What does it mean to be genuine or authentic? How do you know when someone is being disingenuous or putting on a false front? When we are being genuine we remove our false fronts and we speak and react from a real and honest place. This is not easy to do and not typically very good at sensing when and how we are being genuine. However, our “authenticity detectors” are much better at detecting when we are being disingenuous or when we are putting up a false front. We can feel when our behavior feels fake or deceitful. When we are not being genuine or authentic we are blocking our capacity to respectfully engage another person. Respectful engagement requires being real.
An article in Psychology Today entitled “The 7 Habits of Truly Genuine People” provides a nice overview of what authentic people do better than the rest of us. This is a summary of these habits:
- Genuine people speak their mind.
- Genuine people respond to internal expectations, not external ones.
- Genuine people forge their own paths.
- Genuine people are not threatened by failure.
- Genuine people admit their faults.
- Genuine people are not judgemental of others.
- Genuine people have solid self-esteem.
As the author of the article states, any journey of self-improvement and self-discovery will involve efforts to lead a more authentic life. Practicing these skills – in a balanced way can help you with being genuine and enhance your capacity for respectful engagement.
The following video clip is from the movie “Good Will Hunting.” The scene involves the main character Will and his therapist Sean. Sean is challenging Will about his disingenuous behavior and in the process of doing so models what it means to be truly genuine in the moment. What do you observe about how Sean demonstrates being genuine?
What did you observe in Sean that demonstrated he was being genuine? What did you perceive in Will’s reactions to Sean’s statement? Was it effective?
Please note any observations on the film clip in the comments section below. Also, note any other observations, insights or questions on other aspects related to this topic.
When you are done please press the submit button to move to the next topic: Communicating Affirmation.
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